Sub in the City

What is Service Submission?

Top tips for becoming a great service submissive

Service submissive is a type of role associated with Dom/Sub dynamics, which focuses on the Submissive’s dedication and servitude towards their Dominant. The type of service provided within a service-oriented dynamic will usually be something that benefits the Dom practically, sexually, or as part of care. Because there are so many ways to provide and receive service, every individual dynamic you come across will be unique and tailored to both partners’ specific needs and desires.

Who likes service submission and why is it enjoyable?

Despite its name, service submission is far from one-sided – Subs enjoy providing service just as much as their Doms enjoy receiving it. 

This dynamic is usually shared between a Dom/Sub couple, but in some cases, there may be multiple Submissives serving one Dominant, or one Submissive serving multiple Dominants. 

For the Dominant in a service-oriented dynamic, introducing regular tasks can be helpful during the training of their Submissive’s because it gets them used to learning the routines associated with their responsibilities. Service can be a physical indication of a Dominant’s control over their Submissive, as well as the Submissive’s dedication to routine and discipline. Combining an established power play dynamic with acts of service can make regular tasks feel more exciting, and it can take the weight off the Dom’s shoulders (which can be a common goal for service Subs). For example, if a Dom works long hours and often comes home feeling tired, their service Sub might cook dinner, clean and provide physical affection for them to help them relax. This also works well in cases where the Dom experiences chronic pain or has low mobility and might need help with personal care or housework. For some Doms, service submission may help them live out their hedonistic fantasies by feeling pampered or waited on. 

There’s an endless list of reasons that Subs might enjoy service submission. Some Submissives enjoy the comfort and consistency of routines, especially when there’s someone to enforce it or guide them into a headspace that temporarily distracts them from their own responsibilities. As well as this, combining mundane tasks with kink can make a Submissive’s actions feel more intentional, to the point where they derive pleasure from it. 

A lot of service Subs receive gratification from their Dom’s satisfaction, so service can be a way to demonstrate their respect, affection or devotion to their Dom. Similarly, if Acts of Service is a Sub’s love language, service submission may suit them well.

A lot of service submission is to do with an individual’s kinks and fetishes. For example, a Sub might provide service as a way to fulfil their praise kink by making their Dom proud, or Subs with degradation kinks may perform humiliating tasks. Service is also a great way for a Submissive to explore their fetishes, such as bootblacking, being human furniture, or providing foot massages. 

Gender can be an important facet of service submission. A lot of service roles are derived from rigid gender roles, so it can be exciting to explore or subvert these. Through service, female Subs can explore secret fantasies of fulfilling outdated gender roles, such as the archetypal 1950’s submissive housewife, without the feminist shame that comes along with it. Sissies, or men who like to explore their feminine side, might cross-dress during their service Submission, wearing slutty maid outfits and going by a different name/title.

What a service submission dynamic with a Dom might look like

The service a Submissive provides depends on the agreed dynamic between them and their Dom.

Submissives will either follow their Dom’s specific orders, or provide service based on what they think is necessary. Orders could be given verbally, or, if the service is a regular thing, Doms may create rotas to outline the Submissive’s duties and responsibilities. In cases where Subs can provide service outside of their outlined duties, they may be expected to complete regular checks to see what they should provide and how they could exceed their Dom’s expectations. 

Though service-oriented submission isn’t necessarily sexual and usually takes place outside of play, there’s definitely potential to make it sexy. Doms may physically force their Subs into tasks using restraint or rough handling. Service Subs might be collared during their tasks, or given an outfit to wear that matches their duties. Doing tasks incorrectly or missing items off a to-do list could result in a punishment. Doms might challenge their Subs by asking them to wear a remote-controlled vibrator or use impact toys on them to distract them while they provide service, making punishment more likely.

What could service submission look like in a D/s dynamic?

Here’s some of the main areas of service that you may come across, as well as the roles that may be associated with them. Remember: every dynamic has a different style of service, and roles can be mixed and match depending on what suits partners best.

  • Housework: This is probably one of the more popular types of service, which often includes tasks such as cleaning, dusting, washing up and laundry. You’ll definitely see some of these tasks in maid or housewife roles, but it’s common throughout lots of other dynamics too. 
  • Hospitality: Hospitality covers food and drink service, with the main goal being making sure the Dom never goes thirsty or unsatisfied. This can just be between partners, or a Dom might utilise their Sub for bottle service or clearing plates at dinner parties. Some roles associated with this may be servant, butler or slave. 
  • Sexual service: Doms may expect their Subs to provide orgasms or other sexual services on command. Free use, sometimes including multiple people, might come into this if it has been negotiated.
  • Human furniture: Service Submissives might be used as footstools, tables or shelves, or might be expected to hold items for their Dom. This is great for balancing things on Submissives and challenging them to stay still.
  • Aesthetic and pampering: This type of service can really benefit female Doms, or Doms who don’t have the time or energy for self-care. Submissives may help their Doms to relax by running them a bath and giving massages. Aesthetic service can include haircare, skincare, manicures and makeup. Pedicures are also great for Subs with foot fetishes. 
  • Administration: Filing, writing emails and organising appointments can all feel like boring tasks, but it may be something that a service Sub might get pleasure from. Obviously this is a big responsibility, so dynamics like these are better off done with someone you really know and trust. 
  • Pet play: This is less common than the others, but it’s definitely worth a mention. If you’d like to combine service submission with pet play, you could take on the role of a service pup by retrieving and carrying items, or play a protective guard dog.


How to start and maintain a Service submission dynamic

There’s a few important things to consider before you get into a service-oriented dynamic. Firstly, make sure you’re doing it with the right person – this should be someone you trust and that you know won’t take advantage of your submission. Next, discuss why you’re interested in this dynamic and negotiate what you’d both like out of it, as well as your limits. Work out the timings and the intensity of the service – does the service stay in a particular setting or could it take place in multiple settings? Would it be weekends, weekdays, and what sort of times? You could create a timetable or write up a contract if that helps. 

Our tastes, abilities and responsibilities can change over time, so it’s best to communicate with your partner if you’d like to make any changes to your service submission or if there are any problems. A little experimentation might be needed for you to find out what works best for you and your partner, so allow some time to find your own routine and style of service. 

To learn more about your kink desires, take a look at the full list of upcoming workshops on a variety of different topics.

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