The best kinky networking sites

Where to look for the best kinky connections, conversations, education & play

It won’t take most people long to figure out that searching the internet and available apps is a great place to network, learn and date whether for the vanilla dating scene or for kinksters. There is a huge variety of content out there and finding your niche can take some time. To help you along your way I have put together this little guide on what, where, and how you can open up your socials, integrate your kink and gain some knowledge along the way.

Dating

We all know Tinder. It’s simple and effective but often hard to find someone that you really click with after a couple of ‘Hey, how’s it going?’ messages. Your time is precious so why spend time on interactions working out if someone’s into what you are looking for? This is where the kinky dating apps and sites step in, now you can specify what you are and aren’t into. Often these sites are paid and only open to subscribers which can sometimes be prohibitive but often I find this is a great way to find people you can really connect with and are looking more seriously for like-minded kinksters.

It’s worth touching on here that if you are going to put yourself out there on dating apps, remember to be safe if you meet up, don’t be pressured, and always let someone know you’re heading out to meet someone. Safe kinky fun is the aim here. If you’ve got more questions on navigating the scene and making the most of your first foray into a live event then be sure to check out our upcoming workshop on navigating the BDSM scene here.

Most of the dating sites listed below will provide a free trial of sorts and this can be a great way to introduce yourself to a platform without any financial commitment. Find what works for you and has the kinkiest of networks.

Education

The great thing about the world of BDSM and the resources out there is the option to constantly learn more for the kink-curious. Lots of sites will provide endless opportunities to expand your horizons and guide you along the way, whether it’s the study of Shibari, Latex play, or Submission there’s an app to help you along, and often meet some like-minded kinksters along the way.

Social

Sometimes you’ll just want to relax, connect and see what the rest of the BDSM world is up to. Social sites tend to blend a bit of dating with kink knowledge, blog posts, stories, and some stunning media. Expect to find Q&As, forums, industry news, and lots more on these content-rich platforms. Think Facebook for BDSM.

Below I’ve listed a few of my favorites of the three categories with some pros and cons. Happy browsing!

Feeld

“Open-minded meet like-minded”

Feeld believes that nothing is more fluid or less binary than human relationships. The created Feeld, where everyone can be honest with themselves while being responsible towards others. This innovative app links curious and open-minded people with the intention of breaking down the binary nature of relationships.

Pros: Modern design, super-inclusive, interest, and intention-based connections, caters to almost all sexual inclinations, gender, and kink. Couple accounts, group chats, and singles are all welcome here. Caters to polyamorous.

Cons: Relatively new to the scene so the user base can be low in smaller population densities. Best suited to large cities and metropolitan areas. Caters to polyamorous.

Fetlife

“Something for all”

Fetlife is a fantastic resource for all things kink, this one crosses the borders of education, social and dating in one, huge, package. Almost everyone in the fetish scene has been on this site or knows about it so you can be almost guaranteed if you are into it, then there’s a community here for you. Think groups for threesomes, bondage, foot fetish, BDSM photography, ropework, and much much more. Endless hours can be spent here browsing the often professional-level photography, blog posts, and instruction.

Pros: Huge resource. Quality content. Industry news. Educational, dating and social rolled into one. Big community to connect with and plenty of opportunities to ask all of those questions you can’t anywhere else.

Cons: The subscription model restricts access to some areas. Can be difficult to navigate the wealth of information. Verification process isn’t robust and can lead to some misleading profiles.

KK (Killing Kittens) / WeAreX App

“Reducing toxic masculinity and re-establishing the equilibrium”

Killing Kittens, now evolved into WeAreXaApp,  is taking the world by storm. The business started off organising sex parties for women, allowing only couples and single women into the event. At a KK event, you can expect gothic mansions, oyster canapes, and plenty of sex. They have re-invented the dating scene by empowering ‘kittens’ (anyone who doesn’t identify as a single cis-gender male can attend) the moves and taking back control to level the playing field. On this site, the women make the first move. KK, whilst not being primarily BDSM/Kink focused, welcomes people with all different interests. KK organises decadent parties, and events and has a host of educational topics in a sex-positive environment. Expect topics that include:

• BDSM & Kink

• Dating & Relationships

• Health & Wellness

• LGBTQIA+

• Sex Toys & Tech

Pros: Unique concept. High-end clientele. Lavish parties. Sex-positive atmosphere. Breaking gender boundaries.

Cons: Sign up fee of £20 + monthly or annual subscription cost. Paid party events which can be relatively pricey compared to others. Single males can join and chat, but can’t attend events unless invited by a kitten.

Killing Kittens has now evolved into WeAreX App – a sex positive social hub to find likeminded individuals for frienship, play or romance, plus to access some of the best online & in-person workshops & events. Check it out here.